The following information is only available to those with enough government clearance to know about the Secret Music Research Facility in the Center of the Earth, which officially does not exist. Reading or disseminating this information without the proper clearance will be punished by drone strike.


Shitty Mashups is the result of three music researchers living in the center of the earth for thousands of years in an attempt to create the most unmonetizable podcast ever conceived.

Every week the two "smashers" square off by creating mashups based on a given challenge, and it's up to the challenge master to decide which one he likes better. The winner gains admiration of the surface dwellers, the loser gets the release of death by being sent out of the airlock, and into the vacuum of space in the center of the earth.

The Challenge Master

shane's likeness
  • Name: Shane REDACTED
  • Hometown: REDACTED, Texas
  • Fears: Snakes, Harmonic 7ths, February 29th
  • Power Rating: 8.6
  • Field of Study: Exomelodic Theory

The Smashers

ryan's likeness
  • Name: Ryan REDACTED
  • Hometown: REDACTED, California
  • Fears: Hypothermia, The Forbidden "J" Chord, Corrupted Save Files
  • Power Rating: B+
  • Field of Study: Geobeatometry
ian's likeness
  • Name: Ian REDACTED
  • Hometown: REDACTED, Missouri
  • Fears: Spiders, The Reanimated Corpse of Kenny Rogers, Fingerless Gloves
  • Power Rating:👍
  • Field of Study: Cryptofunkology


  • Name: Krog
  • Hometown: Ancient permafrost hundreds of miles below the surface
  • Fears: Raffi
  • Power Rating: UNKNOWN
  • Field of Study: PhD in History
  • Name: The Director
  • No available information